two.years.

I've been dying to write about this thing for the past couple months.
Its about my success and failure in the field call love.
A field where i succumbed and fight for my life or shall i say my pride.
 Since  I was a child, i was dying to be a better one or be the best.
 In a circle, I know I am not the prettiest but i am sure I am  one of the smartest.
 However, once I started grow old, Ive realized so  many things.. like
 I was never really smart in a thing we called love.
 Two years ago, i fell inlove with  a guy,
 He was my rebound guy.. but he didnt  make me feel that  our relationship was for convenience
 For the first few months, when I was with him, I was actually thinking about the one that got away
but he waited patiently  and believe that time will come that id be thinking about him.. only him and I did.
Finally, after a year, i was able to feel that im into him.
 his simple gestures and care made my heart felt.
We reach the point where  we became inseparable.. literally.
I thought  he is the one..... it never occurred to me that id loose the  person who made me feel special, loved, and cared about.
We  had plans. but in a blink of an eye. everything is lost.
Just when i was sooooo inlove with this guy.. he broke my heart into pieces.
I gave him everything ive got. choose him over my friends and even put him first over my own family.
He was my priority,  he became my world
and just when we were about to celebrate something special,,
I learned that he grew tired of me, and replaced me with someone he barely know.
he chose thrill over the trials that we've won over.

and now two years had passed but i still feel that i can never be whole again.
i became obsess with the word love as i am allergic to it.
and God knows when I will be whole again..